Many folks grew with this
hunch. Many watched those romantic movies telling our heart “this
might be true” but, how many people have found it as completely
true?
Perhaps many grew with
Disney's movies. Millions of people heart it was real, up to the
moment the faced it wasn't that way, but it was worthy to keep it
alive, because it gave them live.
I can remember a couple
of faces I saw in my childhood, but that feeling it wasn't love, but
a desire to get it, to have it, to hold it; but it wasn't real, we
didn't make it worked.
Growing old we saw those
faces, but we couldn't get their minds, their inner beings and, if we
ever had a glimpse on those hearts, we all were to dark to see the
light in between: We split, we left, we hurt when being hurt (or
cheated on).
Love is not just a
telling, a feeling, it's a real giving. Love is not a simple choice,
it is much more than a simple decision: It's a willful decision.
Someone
wrote “the Curse of choosing a
soul-mate” and said something
about Rebekkah and Isaac. He said God was all behind that marriage,
but he forgot to tell that there were more human reasons pushing
Rebekkah to marry a man she never saw or knew. He bypassed mentioning
the monetary status
Rebekkah (and her family) saw as an additional blessing on Isaac's
father, because that servant told them Isaac was the heir of
Abraham's belongings.
That
someone wrote this: “ If
Rebekah went to Isaac, without
seeing him,
and accept it as the Will of God/Elohim, then why do all of these
"believers" today think that they get to cast the deciding
vote? ”. I'd like to
share my ideas here -and there- because I cannot post in that article
I found it “fine”, up to the moment that person said “it
is a curse making a personal choice”.
As far as I read the OT,
I see GOD gave each man freewill. He brought to Adam each animal and
Adam gave them some names (I don know) but it is the first proof I
see He (God) man freedom to pick, to choose, as a freewill.
Afterwards, He saw the
man so “alone”, that He gave him an Eve...
How
come will a man be ONE, with his “flesh”, if a woman lacks what
he likes from a woman?
I guess Adam saw
something “missing” he founded out on the person GOD gave him to
LOVE, to care, to protect, etc.
Rebekkah, on the other
side, saw Isaac's grace on the prosperity his servant brought to her
house. Laban bent down, as a servant, just after he saw the
generosity that man carried, but it was for Abraham's sake. It wasn't
the servant's wealth! (Do you need to pick “poverty” instead of
some earthly confort?)
God prospered Abraham and
that servant way's, but the blessing was on Abraham's hand, and on
Isaac reach, as heir.
Yesterday I visited
someone (whose name I won't say) and she told me some domestic
problems she had at home. She told me her man hides the coke or bread
he buys, just to avoid that person's daughter eats what he brought
“home”. I got shocked, but I was told he came to her life when he
was jobless, when he wasn't studying and -barely- he had finished
high school and -being in that condition- she took him into her heart
(and house) and, more than once, she gave him money and helped him to
finish a college career. Let's thank GOD for that! But now he is
jealous his benefactor had had one children before they both
have “made” one son he now wants as her unique heir...
Wow! He is not jealous of
my friend's daughter. His zeal is not for his son, because I know he
likes that woman's daughter leaves alone that apartment to get more
marital power and, in case they divorce, he thinks he could get his
big share (I know it! Because I have talked with him, several times,
before I knew this domestic problem).
None
of them are committed Christians.
That
person is a sibling, so I am related to this very closely, and I am
happy to know SHE LOVES HIM THE WAY HE IS (He was hurt in his
childhood; but I don't condone it,
because both parents are responsible for the end of this very local
“domestic” problem: They made a
choice and one is eagerly more
coherent -and committed- with this loving and unresolved problem:
That woman).
I don't know how they
fell in love. I don't need to know how romantic that was. “Romantic”
is that they sort it out, because that woman had a daughter from a
man who mistreated and, now, she see another man misbehaves, but both
agreed on having one son (not legally married! But in Venezuela same
“right” applies as if they were a married couple).
Love at first sight is
-somewhat- and infatuation. All those hopes, wishes, may come in a
flashback dream, but it needs cement, GOD as a matchmaker, and
renewed commitments. I'm sure all made wrong choices but, those who
keep them alive, are devoted to the person they chose, and seldom (or
never) planned to be cheating, because they stopped winking at their
secrets emotions.
Why do you see too many
persons getting well dressed on Fridays?
Do
they plan a date
with another person (not being their spouses)?
God assured Isaac's wife
by giving some wealth to his father. God worked on Rebekkah, but also
worked on the ways this present world works: Material stuff are an
asset, particularly when a woman already has children (or plans to
get them).
I don't know why many
persons hide with their lies.
I'm sure Abraham chose
his wife willfully, from his very people or siblings. Just read the
O.T. What
was the reason he called her “sister”? It was! But
they didn't have the same parents. Moses took another wife, different
from the former, and the new one was from Africa... Was it the reason
Miriam fought against his brother's leadership?
Jacob
loved the one he chose,
but Laban tricked him to get him would work for seven more years...
Was it love at first sight?
Jacob showed the love he had for Rachel with deeds, not with empty
words.
The whole life tells me
we needed to choose -and pick- each decision. Those granted things
were sometimes disregarded. Those who came along, who wanted to be
very close to us -by clinging- were somehow despised or utterly
ignored with their fears and pains, hurt, with those lies we thought
we could hide.
Someone talked back. He
told he (or she) could hide as long as pleased, but history has shown
humans needed to make choices and God, as well, has shown He made
His decisions and -the last- was sending His own Son to invite us to
repent, to turn away from our “domestic” sins...
What an awesome history
Jesus has written in our lives!
A.T.
P.S.
Wow! Here's a reply
someone gave at that religious person who have said “there was a
curse when choosing”. I just leave it here for you to see:
“Listen,
this whole dating thing is wired into the human brain. The way people
and other living creatures work is that we
seek out the strongest, smartest, nicest, kindest, prettiest,
healthiest partner that we can find.
You shouldn't blame people for that. This is the way we work. You
don't want to marry a frog, do you?
So, outward appearance does matter. Of course, if we were living in a
culture where arranged marriages are the norm, then we would probably
go with our traditions. I don't know where you live, but in my
culture, we have to find our partners ourselves. Others aren't going
to do it for us, so we have to do it ourselves. This
has some advantages and disadvantages,
of course. Everybody is different in some ways, so all of us aren't
looking for the exact same woman or the exact same man. But we all
look for someone who appears intelligent, healthy, etc... you get the
point. By the way, I don't think that you should put so much emphasis
on the word "soul mate." Marriage is about love. You either
love someone or you don't. Of course, people can easily and naturally
co-exist with some people but not with others. We also have to find a
partner that is a good fit. In other words, if two people are
roommates and can't get along at all, then those people would not
make a good couple, I think.
”
We are
not ghosts, as long as we live on earth. So we'd better understand
men have to use their eyes. If you are accepted -loved- the way you
are: Just thank GOD!
It is
a miracle, a blessing, loving someone who
is not perfect (the infatuated way we
could think we are).